“You don’t. Not the way I do.”“What’s this sentiment all of a sudden?”“I don’t know what’s wrong...with me. I kept wanting to get away from Weindorf last night and come to you. I had a feeling that came over me all of a sudden, as if something was happening to you. I finally ditched him just after two, and rushed back here. I went to bed and waited and you didn’t come. It never bothered me before. But last night, I wanted to have you in. He’d already spent thousands on me and he’d never told me no, no matter what I asked him to buy me. I did like earning my own money and I loved the idea of being independent, from him and from my parents.However, what I loved, what I really craved, was all those men’s eyes on me and the look of lust I saw within them. Furthermore, I loved what I saw on those giant TV screens when Derek made those videos and I watched them with him, or spent hours alone when he was at work watching them by. I really did get a kick out of looking at the naked women. It isn't true what they say about women that if they all bent over they would look the same. I didn't see any two that looked similar.I was thinking of finding a woman to have sex with but for some reason it made me feel that I would be cheating on Trudy. Damn, I guess I would have to see how the night went.I didn't know hardly anyone but everybody seemed pretty friendly. Someone mentioned that there were mini-parties going on all. “Yes, I don't want you to get in trouble,” I whined. “I'm not going to get fired sweetie,” She chuckled. “I know, I just don't want people to see us,” I replied. “You're not comfortable with this huh? I'm too old to hide from my sexuality Kim. I used to be like you, but I don't care what people think anymore,” she said. I nodded, she was very smart. “I know,” I answered sheepishly. “Look, I can't be with someone who has to hide all the time, I can't,” She frowned. I could tell by the look.
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